an unusal pastime...or something like it.

ice happens. and just when i was feeling confident in the snow.



i was so close...




I'd like to share a pastime of mine that I've found myself enjoying. It's rather entertaining and took some courage for me to initiate. Nonetheless, I recommend it.

A little context...

Have you ever phoned a technical support customer service telephone number and knew that you were talking with someone in a call center hundreds of miles away? Or a couple thousand? Sure you have...

So a couple months ago, I phoned my student loan lender, Sallie Mae, for questions about the possibility of my accrued interest capitalizing. Yada yada yada. Basically, I was finding out how much money I actually owed in interest.

I called this help number and the voice on other line spoke with a very thick Indian accent.

"Hello, Mr. Brotherton. My name is Jason. How can I assist you today?"

At the get-go, I knew this one was going somewhere. 1)He seemed friendly and chipper and 2) genuinely sounded glad to assist. Both necessary.

I also knew immediately his name couldn't possibly be Jason. Not a chance.

So I decide to make a couple jokes with him. Build a little rapport with this guy. Get him invested a bit...

After I finished asking my questions, and he, answering them. I thank him for his time and convey my appreciation of his thoroughness, etc. Which, honestly, were true. And, as is normal with most calls of this sort, he says,

"Well, Mr. Brotherton, I'm glad I could be of service today. Is there any other question I could answer for you?"

Got him.

"Well, I am curious about one other thing." Pause "Is your name really Jason?"

Silence.

After I hear a small chuckle from his end and a longer pause, he says, in a purposefully unconvincing way,

"Yes. Yes. My name is Jason. Good-bye, sir. Have a nice day."

Click.

These things make my day.

This can also happen in online technical support centers. Usually, you get more canned responses such as "Hi, my name is Alex P. I'm hear to answer your questions regarding your internet service. In a few sentences, describe the problem you are experiencing."
If you get in-depth enough, you can break out of the canned material. Turns out that Alex P. wasn't who he said he was. What gave him away, you ask?

"Is your real name Alex P.?"

"Oh yea. You bet it is." (following immediately by the pre-programmed)
"I hope I resolved your problem in a timely manner. It's our goal to provide you with the best technical support. Do you have any more questions I could assist you with at this time?"


I bought an ink cartridge from an eBay seller from Hong Kong. Didn't show. They sent this reply

Dear Chris ,

We are so sorry to hear that you still haven’t received your order as we do
sent out (uh, what?) on 23th Nov to the following address:
...
I am afraid your item has been lost during delivery. Please be informed that we
could arrange to send a replacement to you immediately, (punctuation?) it might take 7-15
business days, please kindly advise if that would be ok with you and please
double confirm (don't ya mean 'double check') your shipping address again. Alternative (adverb fail), we could refund the
payment to you if you prefer, please kindly advise (what an odd ending to a sentence). We do not want to give you
a bad buying experience even when the shipping is out of our control, your
understanding would be much appreciated.
We apologise (love the British spelling) for the inconvenience caused.

Best regards,
Audrey


Just after this message, it lists the seller's real name.

"eBay sent this message to zhongbin sun."


Zhongbin Sun, I call your bluff.